the wizard tower

carols of the fishers

2008-12-16T04:30:00.000-08:00

Its been more than a month now ever since I became part of the group called FISHERS of MEN. The choir sings at the chapel of Greenbelt every Sunday. I never thought that being a FISHER would bring me so much wonder. I never even imagined that I would be accepted.

Singing Christmas carols has never been this meaningful. Last December 7 FOM serenaded several families in order to gather funds for the operation of cleft lip patients made possible thru the Philippine Band of Mercy. It was really fun singing with them. Our first stop was at Candy Pangilinan’s house. MM her sister was my classmate at the UST Graduate School. Then we went to Tandang Sora at Coney’s place. Our last stop was at Mrs. Gonzales’ place at The Fort. We also sang for the red company last December 9. I was not able to join them in the two last days of the carolling last December 13 and 14 due to my UST DWTL commitment. It was really fun to sing but it’s a lot better knowing that by doing it we are able to extend help to the needy.

I am really blessed to be a FISHER!

FOM sings for PROHECT ABC kids

2008-12-06T23:08:00.000-08:00

Tag teams have been seen to be effective in wrestling and I bet they are far more efficient if we apply the philosophy behind them in real life. Well, I have never imagined that the two organizations close to my heart would team up to make less fortunate kids happy. But it did happen. Today, FOM sang for the PROJECT ABC kids. RJ, Ivy, April, Jessica, Decee, Joyce, Gladys and I rendered Christmas carols for the children. The performance became part of the parents’ orientation.

Seeing them smile made my heart jump up and down. I am happy that even in our own simple way we were able to touch their hearts.

another trio

2008-12-01T02:49:00.000-08:00

Well, perhaps I am one of those who enjoy being busy. This day was certainly one packed day. I was in La Salle Taft in the morning, at Sinagtala Elementary School in the afternoon and at the Bungad Social Hall in the evening. To top it all I’m still awake! Its already 2 am and I am in front of my computer typing this. Whew!

So, I got up this morning at about 5 am. I went to La Salle to give a workshop in the Annual PAPJA Convention. I went there with my friend Ira. She assisted me in my talk regarding photoblog therapy. I never thought that a lot of students from various colleges and Universities would be interested to attend my talk/. It was marvellous! My session lasted for 3 hours from 8 am – 11 am. Lunch was served for the facilitators but Ira and I still went to McDonalds to munch some ice cream even though we already had a sumptuous meal at DLSU. (whahahahah!!!! Takaw).

After lunch, I proceeded to Sinagtala Elemetary School and had my usual tutorial volunteer sessions with Pete, Carmelito and Rem. Rem came all the way from Tarlac and he just visited Manila to help us out teach the kids. Carmelito skipped his Math camp sessions with his students in Cabuyao Laguna. While Pete and I came from Quezon City. But of course! The afternoon session with the kids was really fun. Normally there are 6 to 7 volunteers every Saturday. But, today we had to manage everything though we lack manpower. It was challenging.

After my PROJ ABC volunteer work, I went to the Bungad Social Hall and attended the Lord’s day celebration. My groupmates and I weren’t able to prepare for our presentation for that evening days before the event. So we had to use the spare hour before everything started. Funny, we still won! Knock out!

Ghed, asked me to watch Twilight with him tomorrow. I agreed but I suggested that we see something else since I already saw it. He seems to be sweet and nice. I hope we become good friends. Tomorrow, after choir practice I’ll find out.

my very own EDWARD

2008-11-29T23:55:00.000-08:00

Pete and I have already talked about watching Twilight weeks before its actual showing. We were both curious about the movie and to add up the excitement at home since my sister already finished reading the book. I never thought we would be able to watch today as we have planned because of my hectic schedule. Pete was also sandwiched with his deadlines at work. But we managed to see the movie. We initially wanted to see it at Trinoma but because of the long lines (parang daig pa ang NFA line and mrt!) we ended going to SM North. Whew!

The MOVIE was not what we hoped it to be or perhaps we both have high expectations. Nevertheless, I fun had bonding with Pete (as always!). We munched our mouths with my favorite Holy Kettle Corn during the entire movie. And since we were running late and most of the restaurants were already closed we decided to dine at McDonalds. We stayed there for awhile and have tons of laughter (lagi naman eh, he never fails to make me laugh).

When he brought me home it seems that we still had the energy to laugh again, so he stayed with me for some time. He told me that he is Edward while looking at me straight in the Eye. Then he would laugh and say “Ayaw mo nun Spiderman na Edward pa, Ironman pa dami noh?!” We took pictures (heheh oo noh kami pa!). We almost forgot what time it was. Then I reckoned I still have a talk at DLSU in the morning so he had to go him home and I have to take some rest. Pete leaves in Fairview which is quite far from my place. But despite the distance and the difficulty in getting a ride home it seems that he never gets tired of being with me. I’ll be seeing tomorrow at the tutorials.

I’m really happy. Very very happy

ALL IN ONE DAY

2008-11-09T10:57:00.000-08:00

I never thought it was possible. But it was. I was able to get thru three events today. It was really something.

In the morning, I had to attend to the PEERMA-KAKKAIKAPA interaction. It was fun seeing my club members interacting with the highschool people. According to Ms. Ren this was the first time a gathering of this type was held. At first, it was quite hard to prepare. But with the support of Ms. Ren and the help of Lafi the event was successful. I never thought my boys could really bond with Lafi’s student’s. It was really superb.

After the interaction in the morning, I had to go to Sinagtala Elementary School to do some volunteer teaching. This session was really unique! Well, who would ever thought my friend Lafi (moderator of KAIKKAPA) would teach at SES. He was really good with kids. He was able to make them laugh and entertain them with his wackiness! I bet my ASSET orgnates were also entertained with Laf’s crazy antics. Whahahahahah!!

To top my list is the 42^nd Anniversary Mass of the Days With The Lord. Grabeh!!!!! Karl, Shan, Pae, Ina and I had a roller coaster adventure on our way to Assumption chapel. So they picked me up at Frisco at around 4:30pm. It was a mixed of happenings, we got stuck in traffic, called by a police officer for an unknown violation, got lost and struggled to get to Auumption SanLo on time. But of course we got there and graced the event. Karl carried the UST cross. The event was superb! So after the mass people from ustdwtl dined at Giligan’s Greenbelt to bond.

It was really fun being three places ALL IN ONE DAY.

The Relaunch of ASSET’s Project ABC at Sinag-Tala Elementary School

2008-10-25T20:54:00.000-07:00

It has been four (4) years ever since I became a part of the organization called ASSET (Alumni Scholars for Service Excellence and Transformation of Metrobank Foundation). It is a non-government organization which was established for the purpose of upholding social awareness and environmental concern to the youth as they thrive for excellence in their respective academic and professional fields of endeavor. Being a part of it molded me into become determined and dedicated. I learned the importance of fortitude amidst adversity.

As the organization continuously supports a mission centered on leadership towards social responsibility, it seeks to develop the innate potential to excel among Filipinoes. To realize this goal, the organization seeks not only to create opportunities for the members to interact and share ideas among themselves but also to encourage them to become actively involved in the task of nation-building by initiating socially-relevant activities, community projects and outreach programs.

One of these programs is PROJECT ABC. It provides free tutorial sessions to public school students who have difficulty in reading. The first leg of the said project was held at Marcela-Marcelo Elementary School in Pasay last summer. Since the first leg was found to be successful we decided to relaunch it at Sinag-Tala Elemetary School in Quezon City this October.

We began the preparations and meetings weeks before the launch. We had the final preparations done last October 3 at Metrobank Foundation. Opening day came, October 4, 2008. It was really a big day for all of us. ASSET members were there too help: Jasper, Carmelito, Von, Earl, Peter, Louela, Decee, Juvey. Even Ms. Jackie from MBFI was there to witness the event. Who forget Mike, my co-counselor at LSM who also volunteered for the PROJECT. We never imagined that we would get thru that day but we did! GRACIOUS!

And so, the weeks passed by, tutors come and go. I never thought we would reach the fourth session with complete number of volunteers. Thanx to my to: Karl, Ate Tere, Kuya Manuel Mike and Maui who unwavering responded when I asked them for help. Every session was certainly challenging. Teaching the children how to read requires a lot of effort and patience. Seeing them every Saturday afternoon taught me a lot of things. I learned to be more grateful for God’s blessings.

There will be more sessions to come and I hope that as I teach these children I learn more from them.

HAPPY INJURY

2008-10-12T10:03:00.000-07:00

My co-worker Mike would often tell me “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” I bet that’ s why despite the pain I went thru because of a tendon discontinuation I am still very happy. Who wouldn’t be? After what I realized well, I bet if you’re in my shoes you’d feel the same way.

I was injured last Wednesday while chasing one of my students around the campus. He accidentally bumped me and so… I TRIPPED! For balance I used my left hand to support my body. I was not aware that the force was too much. So when I stood up, I felt the rumbling pain all over my left hand. The doctor at work told me to place cold compress on the affected area. I did that, but my wrist was still aching and it swelled like a huge eggplant the next day. I was told that I should have it x-rayed. But since I promised a friend I would be at her birthday party I endured the painm. I thought it would go away with the medication that was given to me.

October 10 came. It was a Friday. I hoped it would be better but the pain got worse. So, after work I decided to have it x-rayed. But I was really afraid. I don’t want to have a cast on my hand. It would be really difficult. I am not ready to hear the bad news alone. So upon arrival at Trinoma where the last station of the MRT was, I contacted people: Sheryl (who is in kamuning relatively near to where I was), Ate Tere (my thoughtful facilitator at SFC who was busy at that time), Marie (my sister who needed sleep badly due to her work schedule)), FJ (a friend from SFC) and Peter (who was in Makati because of work). Replies came that they can’t make it because of inevitable reasons. I was in the verge of going to Orthopaedic Hospital on my own when Peter’s text came thru. He asked me where I was and told me to wait for him there and that he will try his best to be there as fast as he could.

I was STARDDLED…..

I never expected him to be there but he came. He accompanied me to the hospital and assured me that it will be alright. He sat there beside me, patiently telling me to calm down and that he’ll be with me no matter what happens. It was touching and moving. I realized the honesty and sincerity of his friendship. I never felt so secure with anyone for a long time.

So we waited for the result. He was right, it will be alright. The doctor said my hand just needs rest and some medication to relieve the pain.

It was really amazing how things fell into place

I needed the injury in order to realize the care of a great friend.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

2008-09-21T01:06:00.000-07:00

It was definitely one of the most unforgettable birthdays I ever had.

I have anticipated September 16, 2008 months ago. My office mates would even beg me to step counting down. But I was so excited. So, September 14 came, I had an early celebration with my sister we had pizza and had some quality bonding time. I was terrific. We laughed and talked about things in life as we loiter amidst the walls of SM NORTH EDSA. Then September 15 came, I had an advance lunch celebration with my co-counselors at LSM . We had to celebrate the day before because of a career symposium that we will be busy with the next day. It was really fun! My boss gave me an angel figurine display.

The big day arrived. It was a beautiful Tuesday! My mom called to greet me. Oh gosh! I miss her. I had to assist the high school counselors at work. It was a big day for them. So I just stayed at the auditorium to man the computer with Krishna during the entire symposium. I was taken a back when I got a text from Mike that the principal is looking for me. With much anxiety, I went to her office, only to find out that she just wants to greet me and hug me. Whoa! I was really amazed. I never felt so much warmth during my past birthdays.

After work, I had to rush home to prepare for a dinner date with my friend peter. We dined at my favorite Japanese tea place Bubble Tea. We had Japanese food served. It was really great. I have known Peter for 6 months and I am really happy he is with me at that moment.

The celebration never ended there, it was extended during the ASSET meeting we had last September 20 at Metrobank foundation. I had a marvellous time with my orgmates. We laughed, while arranging the materials for PROJ ECT ABC. It was definitely one of the best working birthdays I ever had!

chapters

2008-09-15T22:30:00.000-07:00

Its been quite sometime ever since I became a part of this mystical jungle called life. At times I don’t understand how things come and go or how certain situations happen with or without my knowledge and consent.

When I was still an infant the only things that made sense to me is a bottle of milk, sleeping whenever I want to, and the caress of my parents whenever I cry. As a child, I used to wonder how dolls differ from trucks, jollibee, twirly and hetty or whether Santa would place something nice inside the socks that Mom hanged for me.

As a teenager, I started asking why my classmates have crushes and pimples. I also learned the true meaning of defiance and its thrills. I saw the importance of being in control of oneself as oppose to peer pressure. I slowly understood the value of my choices.

College life was the page where I welcomed young adulthood with open arms. I met people who taught me so much about life. My eyes were opened to the bitter and sweet reality of friendship and falling in love. I also realized the significance of balance. Being aware of it, allowed me to enjoy despite the inevitable responsibility I am faced with as I maintain my Metrobank scholarship.

College graduation opened the portals to the doors of what is and what is not. It urged me to embrace adulthood without hesitation. This lead me to the journey that I never thought I would ever take…. BEING A GUIDANCE COUNSELOR. I used to think that being a Guidance Counselor is easy and that entails a lot of sitting down and talking about anything and everything under the moonlight. But when I chose to be one, I became aware of the rigors of the profession. It requires A LOT OF PATIENCE and I MEAN A LOT! Working, as a counselor, curved me to be a more defined well-rounded adult. I was able to experience the beauty of life thru others. And even if, I already garnered a Masters Degree in Guidance and Counseling…. I AM STILL NO EXPERT, I HAVE A LOT TO LEARN!

Tomorrow is my birthday…

And for the nth time I am going to turn a new chapter….

isang paraan ng pagtuklas

2008-08-18T18:38:00.000-07:00

Basagin ang tapayan
At sasambulat ang laman.
…………..Sa wakes,
mababatid na ang tangan ng sisidlan.

Pagtalsik ng mga bubog
Maaring masugatan.
………….dadanak ang dugo
hindi ito maiiwasan

Ang mahalaga……..

Magkaroon na
Ng kaliwanagan

miracles

2008-07-27T22:45:00.000-07:00

I am not Wendy not even Mary Jane Watson. But I have my very own Peter. He doesn’t fly or create webs. He doesn’t wear green suits or blue and red tight costumes. But I am certain that he is my hero.

When I am with Pete I feel safe, I feel that I can be myself without hesitation. Although to a certain extent he gives my stomach a jolt. The mere thought of him makes me smile. He excites me in a way that I cannot explain. He is my coffee during hazy and cloudy mornings, he gives me warmth when I feel cold

He is very special to me.

I LIKE HIM A LOT
I COULD EVEN FALL FOR HIM
IF GOD PERMITS ME TO

But for now

Standing right next to him is a miracle.

a life changing experience

2008-07-15T22:29:00.000-07:00

In the ever mysterious path we call life, NOTHING IS PERMANENT. You and I exist in this world in momentarily. We hate to admit it but it’s true. So true. We hold nothing eternal in our hands except CHANGE.

This morning, I saw my life turning upside down. I never imagine that everything could end in one flip of a finger. I was on my way to work like the usual. It was a fine Tuesday. I was not rushing. I was even smiling while walking in the pavements of Shaw Boulevard. By my watch it was about 7am. I told myself “Chelle, you have lots of time.” Yeah maybe I have or I thought I have. I was never late for work. I am always on time. I have to be there by 7:30 am or else I am dead meat. It was a very peaceful journey towards LSM. I even saw Mr. Arenas and I remember him saying “Why are you wearing slippers?” I told him that it would be safer and easier to go to work wearing slippers. I went ahead of him after that chit-chat.

A tune by Sitti Navarro was playing in my head while thinking of what would happen the entire day. I passed by a tall, fat, dark man. I think if I measured it correctly my height would reach up to the middle of his chest. I went ahead of him. He was walking right behind me, rushing if I am not mistaken. I didn’t know what happened but this man suddenly bumped into my back when I was about to cross the street. Suddenly I was off balance. I saw my self falling and hitting the ground. Then, in the corner of my eye a speedy Nissan Terrano appeared. Memories of the past flashed in my head just like a dramatic movie. The faces of the people I love and value showed. I closed my eyes. I realized death was coming for me.

I don’t know what came to me why I uttered “Lord bahala kana. Oras ko na ata.” Then I hit the ground. I heard people shouting. “Yung babae! Yung babae! Nasagasaan ata. Patay ata!” I opened my eyes and I was stunned to see that my head or my right cheek to be exact was almost two inches away from the right wheel of the car that was about to crash me in to pieces.

It was God’s grace.

I am still alive and sharing with you this experience.

My two central front teeth were chipped. The dentist at work told me that it could be fixed with the aid of light cure filing. I have a few bruises. But I’ll be fine. It just came to me that we don’t own our lives. IT IS HIS.

If I died at that moment
I would not be able to tell my Mom and Dad how much I love them.
I would not be able to hug my brother and sister.
I would not be able to tell my boss that I am happy working at LSM.
I would not be able to tell Mike and Niko that I really appreciate them
I would not be able to show my ASSET orgmates that I enjoy being with them.
I would not be able to tell my sister’s boyfriend that he is a part of the family already.
I would not be able to tell Rachel that she is always welcome in the house.
I would not be able to tell my bestfriend that 15 years with her could extend beyond eternity.
I would not be able to tell my UST friends that I miss them.
I would not be able to sing for the Lord again
I would not be able to show PETER HOW SPECIAL HE IS TO ME.

From this experience I Learned that we should always give our best in everything we do.
LIFE IS SO SHORT TO BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED.

one fine sunday

2008-07-08T23:41:00.000-07:00

For almost a year my bestfriend urged me and her guy officemate Lou to go out. But we never did. No matter how hard she tried to bug us to contact each other and meet up, we didn’t. But surprisingly when she stopped pairing us off, Lou began to contact me. We started to talk to each other last May and two months later we went out.

It was a Sunday. July 6 to be exact. I told him earlier that I usually start my Sundays by attending mass. So we went to San Agustin. I was astonished when he suddenly told me in the middle of the ceremony “Chelle, I have to confess something…. I am not a catholic.” I don’t know if I will be flattered or turned off. But I just let it all go. But honestly it was really a biggie that he accompanied me to church.

Then, we went to a nearby mall to have lunch. We really didn’t plan what to do because we wanted the day to be an adventure. After filling our stomachs up with Japanese food we went to see WANTED. It was not a usual sappy date movie but I love it.

It was already 4pm when we decided to go to THE BLOCK a mall near my place. I told him that I need to go the grocery to buy my week’s lunch supply. So off we went to hypermart. He had been treating me the entire day and I guess he was tired walking around. So, told him that it’s my turn to give him a treat. We had tea at my favorite tea house BUBBLE TEA. There we laughed a lot and shared stories about our childhood. Hours went by and we didn’t even notice that it was already 7:30 in the evening. We wanted to stay more, but I still have work the next day. So off we went home and that’s how one fine Sunday ended.

It was really fun hanging out with Lou and I guess we can be great friends in the future.

figuring it out

2008-06-14T22:41:00.000-07:00

If you don't go after what you want
YOU'LL NEVER HAVE IT

If you don't ask
THE ANSWER IS ALWAYS NO

If you don'r step forward
YOU'RE ALWAYS IN THE SAME PLACE

TAKE RISKS FOR LIFE GOES ON....

_________________________________________

Yeap this quotation is so true. There are so many questions running in my head and at the momenet I am standing in a cliff, deciding whether I'd jump off or just turn back. Although I am aware that not deciding at all is already a decision I don't know what hinders me. Maybe, I am just afraid. I guess everybody is entitled to that feeling. I don't know what lingers ahead of me. Well, that's a reality I can never escape..... ONLY TIME CAN TELL... ONLY TIME....

I'm just afraid to lose you pete

so afraid.....

SIGNAL FIRE

2008-05-11T08:51:00.000-07:00

by: Snow Patrol

The perfect words never crossed my mind,
Cuz there was nothin' in there but you.
I felt every ounce of me screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me.
All I wanted just sped right past me,
While I was rooted fast to the earth,
I could be stuck here for a thousand years,
Without your arms to drag me out.

[Chorus:]
There you are standing right in front of me
There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close, cuz I need you to guide me to safety.

No, I won't wait forever
No, I won't wait forever

In the confusion and the aftermath,
You are my signal fire.
The only resolution and the only joy,
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes.

[Chorus (x2)]

No, I won't wait forever
No, I won't wait forever
No, I won't wait forever

Agio

2008-04-18T17:30:00.000-07:00

Pilit hinuhulma ang malambot na putik.
Di magkamayaw ang mga kamay,
Lubhang puno ito ng laman.

Nagpapawis,
Nanginginig,
Namimitig.

Ngunit kung sisilipin,
Makikita na nanunuot
Sa pagitan ng mga daliri
Ang umaalpas na hangin.

At ang tanging naiiwan
………..ay ang mga marka.

Buhawi

2008-04-15T18:29:00.000-07:00

Niyayakap ng hangin ang alikabok
Pilit ikinukulong,
Kinakandili sa kanyang lupaypay na bisig.

Aalpas kaya ito?
At tuluyang babangga
Sa pader ng kawalan.

…………………o

Magpapahingalay
Sa kumakalinga

Umaalog nanaman ang buong bahay

Kwentong Gago

2008-03-20T16:00:00.000-07:00

Sambakol ang mukha ng berdugo
Tuloy-tuloy ang paghagupit
Walang tigil ang pag-agos,
Naghalo na ang kahoy at laman
Dugo, alikabok at pawis
O kay bigat ng pasan ng gago
Bakit ba niya tangan
Ang troso mo?

hindi ako marunong magsulat

2008-02-17T00:14:00.001-08:00

Dugo ang tintang naaninag
Sa papel na basa ng luha.
Dito ko nilalayong ilathala
Ang aking mga akda.

Walang akong pormal na kasanayan.
Mga likha ko’y bunga lamang
Ng mapaglarong isipan
At nag-aapoy na damdamin.

Salat ako sa karanasan
Bilang isang makata.
Mangmang kung ikukumpara
Sa lahat ng mananalaysay.

Ngunit,
ang akda ko ay akin.

Hindi natatangi ang aking pluma.
Subalit bawat sa marka nito,
Mababatid ang pangarap kong matuto;
At ang pagnanais na makilala ang sarili ko
sa likod ng mga kathang
bumubuo sa aking pagkatao.

wondering...

2008-02-13T09:10:00.001-08:00

I’m really wondering how one person can stir my mind bigtime. Amidst my busy schedule, its so funny that I still get the opportunity to be enthused this way. Its seldom that I feel challenged and excited especially after that long healing process I had to go through a couple of months ago. And yes, I am again smiling! Is that good or bad? Hmmm, fair I guess. But I have to admit I’d like to stop wondering now. Two things could possibly happen if this continues: 1. I am going loose the composure that I recently acquired (I am really afraid of that, allowing myself to feel things) 2. getting hurt (I don’t want to go back to the dungeon again!).

Although, it doesn’t necessarily follow that I would fall for someone who makes me wonder, I think I should be cautious (better safe than sorry). I don’t even want to think what this person feels about me or how he sees me. Though I sensed that he is into someone else, it doesn’t really bother me. However, I am really fuzzing how he gives me this impression that I need to get to know him more. (duh!)

Call me a coward, but at this day and age, after all that I have been into, yeap, I am avoiding that feeling. I have never been this careful in my life. Still, I have to acknowledge the fact that I am but human, and whether I like it or not I will be free from control sometime soon. I will fall in love again. Yeah, maybe…. But maybe not now or maybe if a powerful shock can awaken me.

I am not closing my doors. I am just trying to balance things this time.

The Scribes - from the writings of Elle

2008-02-09T19:52:00.000-08:00

Ere

Chief scribe
"Master of the Contellations"

Dora
"The Oracle"

Ester
"The Morning Light"

Rian
"The Swordsman"

Marco
"The Candle Bearer"

Ren
"The Monk"

Elle
"The Charmed One"

......29th of November

It never occurred to me that I would be a scribe. According to the white witch of the west, scribes are wise and magical beings and I am not any of those. I am a nobody or that was what I believed I was before this day came. I live in a box. I dwell in a fix square container where all things happen based on an exact timeline.

But that was then, that was before I saw the gold strands of light crowning my head. It was really marvellous! Authentic!

Today, though I still think I am ordinary…. I know that there is always magic in what I do, what you do and we do… as long as we believe....

.................................................................................................................. -Elle

PAGKAMULAT

2008-01-26T13:46:00.000-08:00

Paano nga ba nadungisan
ang malinis na batis
ng putik na mula sa mga paang
malayo pa ang nilakbay
matamo lamang
ang tinaguriang
rurok ng kaligayahan?

taglagas

2008-01-06T17:04:00.000-08:00

walang tigil ang pamumulot
ng mga dahong
nagmamadaling humalik
sa mainit na lupa.

ilang tagtuyot na
.........ang nasaksihan.
kaunti na lang
.........sasapit na
ang pagsibol
na inaantabayanan

bukas.........
mamamangha muli
sa pagtubo
ng panibagong
bulaklak.

ngunit ang lahat.........
ng simula
.........hindi magaganap
kung wala
................................ang katapusan.

tumataas na ang bunton
nitong mga dahon
nagkukulay kape na
.........ang kalangitan

paalam na sa nakaraan

Ikaw ay Isang Tula

2008-01-06T11:01:00.000-08:00

Di maarok ng kawalang-malay
Mga talinhagang nakakabit
Sa misteryosong pagkatao.
Bawat salitang binabanggit
Maaninag ang naiibang sining.
At lahat ng tinuturan,
Kumukurot sa puso
Lumilikha ng kislot sa isip.

Saklaw ng ritmo
Ang iyong mga galaw.
May imahen ang mga kilos,
Isang katotohanang
Hindi namumutawi sa bibig.

Kay tagal na sinuri,
Pinagbulayan,
Ang tema sa likod
Ng iyong mga ngiti.
Nakatitigalgal na malaman
Sa kabila ng mga metapora

---Natatago
ang iyong kalungkutan.

unexpected packages

2007-12-31T02:28:00.000-08:00

Friendships develop thru interactions with others. It involves simultaneous acceptance and adaptation willingly given by two complementary/supplementary parties. Such premise has certainly fortified my existence. I have learned the value of life, love, trust and forgiveness with the aid of my comrades. I also understood that friends are different from acquaintances. They are the individuals whom are souls can go naked with. They come to us in unexpected packages. Some are nicely wrapped with silk ribbons and fancy papers, while others are placed in neat boxes. But no matter how they are parcelled, in the end what counts most is how we accept them especially when we become aware of their genuine contents.

In my 24 years of stay here one earth, I have met a few good souls whom I consider my allies. Once in my wayward life, it never came to me that we would be this close. As far as I can remember, we have all climb hilltops to be where we are now. Although I am not sure how long will this last, I am just grateful they came.

The Golden Compass

2007-12-25T07:27:00.000-08:00

a movie review

The Golden Compass is one of the much awaited films in 2007. The trailer is definitely overwhelming especially if you are a fan of Nicole Kidman (Mrs. Cutler in the story) and Philip Pullman (the author of this famous book). Like many other, movie buffs, film critiques and book worms I have great expectations for the movie. I had so much hope that Chris Weitz (writer and director of the screenplay) would break history with his script and direction of the movie. Sadly, the screenplay didn’t even reach one third of my expectation. Weitz was not able to give justice to the work of Pullman. The film failed miserably to deliver any semblance of the author's story. The film was not able to deliver the most important points sighted in the book. Also, the abrupt shifts in the movie confused viewers regarding the message embedded in the screenplay.

If we separate the book from the entity of the screenplay, the movie will fail to stand on its own. Although, its cinematography is certainly commendable, the totality of its content is execrable. The story was truncated beyond the necessity involved in translating a book to film, the intricacies of the characters (especially Lyra) were swept over with a series of single scene expositions that do not readily allow viewers to explore the depth of each pesrona. Despite the talents of all the actors involved the direction of Weitz failed to show his audience the connection of one character to another.

All in all in a scale of 1 – 10, 1 being the lowest and ten being the highest, I’m giving the movie a rating of 2. A point goes to the cinematography and another point goes to Wietz for his efforts.

At the moment, it is one of the most disappointing films I have seen this year.

BASAG

2007-12-14T11:30:00.000-08:00

Walang takot na sinalubong
Ang matatalim na bato.
Buti’t galos lang ang natamo
Sa biglaang pagkakaluhod.
Muntik ng sumabasob
Ng tangkaing saluhin
Laman ng mesang tumaob.
Kahit halos mabangasan
Pagkahulog ay di napigilan.
Pira-pirasong sumambulat.
Mga himaymay ay nagkalat.

Sa isang iglap,
Ang kristal na pinakaiingatan
Walang patumanggang nawasak
Inagaw ng anino
Kawalang-malay ng tunggak.

space

2007-11-30T05:20:00.000-08:00

If in between heartbeats
Lies the flame of perpetual darkness,
Can drops of blood
Quench the thirst
Of a lost soul?
Indeed,
It was adrenalin rush
That provoked awakening.
The flesh is again
At its finest
The scars,
Yes, the scars
The scars of yesterday,
They can no more be seen.
Then, amidst ambiguity
Surprising,
Yet unwaveringly true
A faint throb
Activated a bomb
That blasted the emptiness away.
Suddenly, everything is at a halt.

Boyhingi

2007-11-27T12:00:00.000-08:00

His shirt was painted with mud, his hair was dry and sticky; if my calculations are correct his is between seven to eight years old. But I am certain that his eyes showed the burdens of an adult. Let’s call him Boyhingi.

I saw him yesterday afternoon standing in front of the main entrance of SM North. He was begging for alms. I was relishing my snack. He looked at me. His gaze was filled with hope. I actually guessed what he wanted even without saying a word. So, I came near him and leaned forward; I told him to wait for me. His lips were small and dark but then that did not prevent him from smiling at me when he heard what I said.

My mouth quivered as I hurriedly ate the shawarma sandwich in my right hand. I was quite disturbed with the thought that he is watching me savour the taste of my snack. He patiently stood there. Perhaps, he was wondering why I asked him to wait for me. When I finished my sandwich I grabbed his left hand without any hesitation. I told him to come with me. We were about to enter the mall when he suddenly said “Bawal po kami diyan sa loob.” Being taken aback by what he said I asked him “Kumakain ka ba ng donut? Ibibili na lang kita sa loob ha. Dito ka lang.” So I had to leave him there as I purchased donuts for him. I don’t have much money yesterday and I wished I could give him more. I felt so guilty that with God’s many blessing I could only do so much for this boy.

After coming out from the donut store, I went straight to him to hand the bag of donuts. I was about to ask him where his parents were, but he went away after receiving what I gave him. I was left there hanging and wondering what will happen to him some years from now.

Many times, I encounter children like Boyhingi in the streets. I see them coming up jeepneys wiping the shoes of strangers they don’t know. I meet them in the church selling sampaguita garlands. I see them everywhere. We see them everywhere. Some people would just give them coins just to avoid the nuisance they bring whenever they ask for alms. Others would blame their parents for their misery. Tsk! Tsk!

With the naked eye, he might look less of a darling to any of us. But he is an angel in the eyes of God. When you see him around, think of him as God’s little messenger. He is inviting you to do good.

steadfast

2007-11-22T15:14:00.000-08:00

“Uy, ang tagal na nating di nagkikita. Kamusta?”

“Mabuti. Pero mas mabuti nga ngayon kausap kita eh.”

“Toh naman, ngek, kaw nga diyan kala ko nakalimutan mo na ako.”

“ Kahit kelan, di kita makakalimutan.”

“Talaga lang ha? Di ka kasi nagpaparamdaman.”

“ Lagi lang naman akong nandito para sayo. Ikaw ang naging abala sa mga ginagawa mo kaya siguro akala mo nawala ako.”

I thought I was all alone all this time,
I thought you have forgotten me
But, it was I who neglected your love
But, it was I who left you
Yet, without hesitation
You still care for me.
Now with you,
I am home to stay...

Minsan ganyan tayo. Akala natin iniwan NIYA tayo. Akala natin nag-iisa tayo. Akala natin pinabayaan NIYA tayo. PERO MARAMING NAPAPAHAMAK SA MALING AKALA.

When we fail, when we are hurt, when we loose in the game of life we blame HIM; we accuse HIM of leaving us behind, when in truth HE was standing right beside us all this time. The problem is, we are too busy to notice HIM; we are too pre-occupied with so many other things to take note of HIS presence. In most cases, we place HIM in the bottom of our priority list and with 99% certainty we suddenly remember HIS role in our lives when we are in the pangs of agony and despair. We treat HIM like a bank, wherein we are always on the verge of withdrawing even without depositing. Still, HE gives us what we need because he is merciful and loving.

Sometimes, we think he cannot hear our calls but HE does! Believe me or not. HE is available to hear us out 24 hours 7 days a week. Walang palya yan! Daig NIYA ang suncellular mo 24/7 di lang call and text ang available… madami pang iba. He can reach the far ends of the globe… because with him LAHAT POSSIBLE. Ganyan SIYA katindi.

Our relationship with HIM should never be limited to ritualistic activities prescribed by religion. Our bond with HIM is a pact that should be carried on in our day to day existence.

In my 24 years of stay here on earth, I have witnessed HIS unending love. He has shown me the colors that are beyond what the naked eye can see. HE is the light of my eyes amidst darkness. I never thought I would make it this far. But because HE is with me every step of the way I was able to see the sun at night...

GOD is more than enough...
_________________________________

Isang pangakong di mababali kailanman

“Basta ikaw chelle, BASTA IKAW!”

“BASTA IKAW LORD! BASTA IKAW!”

Ikaw,Ang Hangin At Ang Ulan - by: Vener Santos

2007-11-18T07:24:00.000-08:00

para kay salamangkera

ikaw...

sa bugso ng bagabag na sa isip mo'y tumutulak,
sa gumuhong pusong 'di kinaya ang bigat,
sa napiping panalanging hindi makalipad,
lagi silang naririyan,upang ika'y tulungang
ihakbang ang iyong mga paa,ihele
ang damdaming nasasabik sa panaginip.

ang hangin...

laging nakaalalay sa bawat mong galaw,
tahimik mang nakamasid sa iyong paligid,
laging may hatid na ginhawa sa bawat
mong langhap,kumakalas ang taling
sumasakal sa 'yong pusong naninimdim.

ang ulan...

sa tuwing ika'y nauuhaw sa paglaya
ng damdamin mong napupugnaw,
sa init ng luha na asidong tumutunaw
sa 'yong puso,naririyan siya
upang lunurin ang lumbay,
at sa tuwina'y kaagapay mo
sa pagdidilig ng punla
ng pag-ibig sa iyong puso.

___________________________

"sana makatulong to sa paglutas mo sa gusot ng lovelife mo...hehe." - Vener Santos (Posted by vener santos last 2007/9/25 9:30:00 at penster.fyi.ph)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
well, i guess veny is one of those few people who knew what i felt back then.... thank you so much for being a friend vener santos....

Fallen Cleft

2007-11-16T10:40:00.000-08:00

specially made for japhet's mom

I heard the wind whisper my name,
The echoes bounced back and forth
And left my ear a resounding melody.
The gentle murmurs cascaded
Like an old memory -
I miss your bosom,
That flowery bosom,
Oh, that flowery one;
Where seeds of music
Came to life;
No one can disturb
Her silent lullaby.

Departure from my side
Was not part of the prophecy;
For your hand
Is my sanctuary.

I miss your bosom, Mom
I miss you.

(a collaboration between Japhet Calupitan & SaLaMaNgKeRa)
___________________________________________
Japhs, whereever she is... I bet your Mom is proud of you.

LUMOS

2007-11-03T23:23:00.000-07:00

Sa ilalim ng itim na ulap,
Maaninag ang naiibang kislap
Ng mga luhang nabuo
Mula sa walang tigil
Na pagtangis.

Habang unti-unting
Nahihimlay sa karimlan,
Patuloy ang pagindayog
Upang bigyang buhay
Ang napapagal na kaluluwa.

At sa kanyang pagyao,
Maiiwan ang mga bakas
Ng natunaw na sera
Na minsang nagpainit
Sa malamig na gabi.

Baliw at Bilanggo

2007-10-30T00:20:00.000-07:00

Pader na itim
Ang kanilang pagitan,
Manipis na hangin
Ang tanging ugnayan.

Mga isip ay nagtagpo
Sa kahong de kuryente.
Mga katauha’y nagbunggo
Sa gitna ng mga kable.

Mahabang kurdon
Ang naging daluyan
Ng dalawang puwersang
Ikinulong sa karimlan.

Ang sala ng una,
Pagtalikod sa kamalayan.
Napiit ang ikalawa,
Sa pagkitil ng nadarama.

Sabay na humagod
Sa rehas na kalawangin,
Iisa ang sukat
Ng seldang nais lisanin.

Sa paghigpit ng kadena,
Sinikil ang pagtangis
Ng tahimik na umaga.

Mga kaluluwang ligaw
Ay malaya na.

Rosaryo

2007-10-28T03:33:00.000-07:00

Shhh!!! Ale,
Wag kang maingay
Nagdadasal ako!

Nagdadasal din ako!
Malaki ang hinihingi ko,
Kaya dapat malakas.

Ano ba hinihiling mo?
Sabihin mo sa akin
At isasama ko
Sa mga panalangin ko.

Isauli mo na
Ang asawa ko!

Lantang Bulaklak

2007-10-24T23:20:00.000-07:00

Kamakailan lang
Kasabay ng mga klik
At iba’t ibang pitik
Narinig ko ang himno
Mula sa mga bubuyog.
Nakapaligid sila sa'yo.
Nagkakagulo,
Natataranta,
Nag-uunahan.
Nahuhumaling sa kariktang
Likha ng sari-saring kulay.
Naiigaya sa halimuyak
Na buhat sa pagkasariwa.
Subalit mabilis ang pag-akyat
Ng hangin sa bundok
At lahat ay naglaho
Pagdating sa taluktok.

Marahil,
Mananatili na lamang
Ang gandang namasdan
Sa likod ng kamera.

SALAMIN

2007-10-18T01:40:00.000-07:00

Sinabayan ko
Ang pagyukod ng iyong ulo.
Imbis na matunaw
Sa mga titig mo
Sinaklawan ko
Ang iyong kabuoan
Ng mga tingin ko.
Umidayog ka
Sa aking harapan
Ng buong giliw.
Sa iyong
Malikot na galaw
Sinubukan mong agawin
Ang aking katauhan.
Datapuwat ay balot ako
Ng liwanag,
Nasilaw ka
At tumigil sa pag-indak.
Sa muli mong pag-aninag
Nasilayan mo
Ang baluti kong
Likha ng iyong persona.
Nagimbal,
Nagulantang,
Nayanig
Ang iyong pagkatao
Sa katotohanang
Sa akin ay
Wala kang maitatago.
Pagkat sumasaiyo ako
At ikaw ay sumasakin.
Tayo ay iisa.

Pagpaling ko sa kanan
Pumihit ka sa kaliwa.
Hindi mo ako maiiwasan
Talikuran mo man
Ang aking katawan.
Makitid ang espasyo
Sa ating pagitan.
Sa iyong paglapit
Nakapagtataka
Na hindi man nagdaiti
Ang ating kaluluwa
Patuloy na nagsanib
Ang ating hininga.
Napagtanto ko
Ikaw pala
Ang bumubuhay sa akin.

Ginalugad mo
Ang aking mga kanto.
At sa bawat sulok
Natuklasan mo
Ang mga lihim
Sa iyong pagiging tao.
Hindi sinasadya
Unti-unting bumulaga
Sa iyong kamalayan
Ang mga kalakasan mong
Naka-ugat sa akin.
Naisin mo mang ikubli
Ang iyong mga kahinaan
Mananatiling ako
Ang iyong tunay
Na pagkakakilanlan.
Marahil sa akin mo
Lamang masusumpungan
Ang matagal mo ng
Inaasam na kasagutan.
Pagkat sa aking balintataw
Mababanaag mo ang tugon
Na walang bahid
Ng pagkukunwari.
Ikaw ay ako
At ako ay ikaw.

ALAMBRENG SAMPAYAN

2007-10-10T16:40:00.000-07:00

para kay alambre

Wangis mo’y
Espesyal ang hubog.
May pormang magara
Na kinamamanghaan
Ng sino mang labandera.
Sa Iyong makisig
Na pagkawagayway,
Walang pasubaling
Sa matiponung kawad mo’y
Kay inam sumampay
Upang sa bugso ng hangin
Matuyo itong
Basang suliranin.

Henyo ka
Sa paningin ng araw.
Higit ka pa sa martir
Sa pananaw ng ulan.
Gaano man kabigat
Ang damit mong tangan
Paghihimutok sa iyo’y
Hindi mauulinigan.
Kung minsan,
Di maiiwasang
Ikaw ay mapatid.
Pagkat iyong kalasag
Matibay man,
Ay may hangganan din.

Bininat ka
Ng init at lamig.
At sa iyong pag-iisa
Tanging tukurang kayawan
Ang iyong kasama.
Mga nasaksihan mo
Sa iyong pagkakasabit
Kikintal sa gunita,
Hindi mawawaglit.
Kaya’t bayaan mong
Awitan ka ng maya.
Magpahinga ka sa saliw
Ng kanyang musika
Upang magdugtong
Mga napigtal na alaala.
Nararapat na magpalakas ka.
Pagkat bukas
Mas marami pang labada!

________________________
Keith, alam ko makakaya mo ang lahat
Naniniwala ako sayo.

ESPASYO

2007-09-29T23:38:00.000-07:00

(para sa kanya)

Kung mananalaytay
Ang apoy ng puso
Sa kabuoang batbat
Ng pangamba
Mapapawi kaya
Ang pagkauhaw
Ng kaluluwang ligaw?
Hindi ba’t silakbo
Ang nagtulak
Kung kaya’t sa kabila
Ng pagkapagal
Ay nagawang pumitlag
Ng damdaming
Kay tagal ng nahimlay.
Wala na ang bakas
Ng mga sugat ng kahapon.
At sa gitna ng kalituhan
Isang kidlat ang yumanig
Sa kanyang katauhan!
Tumigil ang pag-inog
Ng sandaigdigan.
At ang nawawala
Maari ng matagpuan
Panahon lamang marahil
Ang tanging kailangan.
Matatabunan na muli
ng liwanag ang karimlan.

_________________________

mula sa salamangka
ng pusong nahahalina
silakbo ang nagtulak
upang maisatitik ang nadarama

SILAKBO

2007-09-03T22:21:00.000-07:00

Ikaw ang naghudyat
Upang mailuwal
Ang laman ng isipan.
Nang dahil sayo,
Nabuhay sa katotohanan
Ang damdaming pinag-alab
Ng mga karanasan.
Walang patumangga
Mong inudyukan ang pluma.
Kung kaya’t sa papel
Ay dumanak ang tinta.
Nailathala mo
Ang apoy ng diwa,
Pagkat ikaw
Ang dugo na nanalaytay
sa sanlibutan.
Makapangyarihan ka!

KAPATID

2007-08-03T05:37:00.000-07:00

para kay marie

Umuwi siyang susuraysuray,
Buti umabot sa pinto
Ng aming bahay.
Imbis na kumatok,
Ginising niya ang lahat
Sa kanyang malakas na iyak.
Moowah! moowah!
Tila isang pumapalahaw na baka,
At Natulig ang aking tenga.
Pagbukas ng pinto,
Bumulwak ang suka.
At umagos ito
Na animo'y lava.
Gusto ko siyang iwan
Sa labas ng tarangkahan.
Ngunit,
Nakita kong
Malamlam ang kanyang
Mga mata.
Waring nakikiusap.
Kaya kahit mabigat siya,
Gamit ang lahat ng aking lakas
Hinila ko siya sa loob.
Pinaliguan.
Binihisan.
Ipinagtimpla ng kape.
Mainit,
Matapang,
May kaunting tamis,
Pero tiyak kong
Magigising ang kanyang
Pagal na kabuoan.
Gusto kong sumigaw!
Mainis at mairita.
Pero natigilan ako,
Mahal ko sya.
Di ko alam
Kung ano ang buhay
Kung wala
Ang mga oras na ganito.
Di ko lubos maisip
Kung paano
Ang lahat kung
Di siya
Ang kapatid ko!

________________________________________________

si marie

Alas-singko na ng umaga, tulog na si Marie. Mabuti naman at payapa na siya.

Alas-tres y media na siya dumating. Tahimik na tinatahak ng aking isipan ang hiwaga ng gabi ng biglang pumitlag ang aking damdamin dahil sa malakas niyang iyak. Dinig ko ang kanyang boses mula sa aking silid. Wala akong nagawa kundi tumayo mula sa aking pagkakahiga. Ako na lamang ang gising sa buong kabahayan.

Lasing na lasing ang kapatid ko. Di ko alam ang mararamdaman ko. Maiinis ba ako o maawa sa kanya. Bahala na. Bukas mag-uusap kaming dalawa.

SaLaMaNgkeRa

2007-07-04T21:10:00.000-07:00

Huwag kukurap,
Di dapat mag-apuhap,
Pagkat maaring di maaninag
Ang kislap ng kanyang kalasag.

Tila isang tala sa kalawakan.
May liwanag na hatid sa karimlan.
Animo’y isang hudyat ng pag-asa
Sa nasisiphayong kaluluwa.

May kinang ang kanyang salamangka.
Na mamasid sa bawat kumpas ng barita.
Nasasalamin ang naiibang kinabukasan
Sa kanyang misteryosang katauhan.

Isang marikit na awit sa umaga,
Nakabibighani at nakahahalina.
Kaakit-akit ang kanyang katapangan
Nagpapasigla sa nanambitan.

Maihahalintulad ang kanyang kapangyarihan
Sa diwatang reyna ng karagatan.
Ang busilak ngunit mapanuri niyang puso,
Tiyak na masisilip gaano man ito itago.

Siya ang salamangkera,
Dilag na nababalot ng mahika.
Di maitatanggi ang katotohanan
Na dala niya ay kaligayahan.